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If Britney did a blog post, it would go something like this one is going too. I am stoned, overtired, worried, but excited and random, very very random. Train crash city.
So I was going to tell you how I'm actually going away for a few days, to stay in a hotel, with mum, both of us, away, as in not here, where I am right now, in this bizarre life, like Dorothy Gale, only with purple sparkly shoes, because those red ones make her look like a prostitute, but then today, Dad was diagnosed with a blood clot, in his leg and now I don't know if we are going away or not, because he may be admitted into hospital tomorrow, or they may send him home on Warfarin.
Dear God, please let it be ok for us to go away, to the hotel with the hydrotherapy pool swimming pools massage and alternative treatment centre saunas bowling alley crafts centre jacuzzi rifle range private beach and cellulite inducing food AMEN.
My brother is planning to come and look after Dad, which just makes me go HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NOW YOU'LL REALISE! But alas, this is not a place to go into sibling grievances, but still, I can't help the knowing glow of satisfaction in my belly.
Oh and, why did no one ever tell me about this band? Hey you, looking at the floor over there, why didn't you tell meeeee?! And the video is just........ soo......... groooooovy baby, really, it makes me want to sway manically with my bong. If I had a bong, which I don't, although this post may give the opposite impression, but, whatever, ya'll can think what ya like.
Oh and you know those scarves I ordered from BidTV, well they came and they are ooh SO soft, so soft in fact that I may have to sleep with them, which would be a good idea, because I couldn't fit them into my scarf drawers, so I decided to clear them out...
And I think that's all I have to say, unless I tell you about the Supermarket toilet incident this morning, which actually I won't, because it may make you gag, but in my defense, I was stressed after a text about my Dad, which makes for a poorly tummy and a desperate situation, but I was also quite proud, because not many people can clear a public area that quickly. Yey me!
So, unless I don't go away, there will be tumble weed silence for a week, whilst I am trying to bring myself back from the brink of insanity, just like Britney. Now I'm passing the phone to my assistant, I need to go take a shower ya'll.
